Racist Bastard

I felt pensive in the perfect weather. Was disappointed that I'd gone to Home Depot over lunchtime and got nothing. Rewarded myself at the Carl's Jr drive-thru anyway.

Someday I'll no longer consider fast food a reward, but for now I still love it in small doses. Too much, and I feel like crap, or feel like it will make me look like crap, which is close enough to the same thing. But once in awhile a teriyaki or jalapeño burger and fries are just the thing and these were my only thoughts when I drove up.

A long string of teenaged girl-speak cascaded out the speakers of which I gathered nothing except that it was some sort of sales pitch.

"Honestly, I didn't understand a word of that," I said, laughing. "But anyway--"

"Oh, I am sorry," she said, and repeated a shortened version of suggestions of what to buy.

"Well, anyway," said I, and asked for a #5 or whatever it is for a teriyaki burger. While idling my car in line I realized I might inadvertently have insulted her.

I'm so accustomed to different accents I hardly notice them. When she first spoke I thought she was just some semi-articulate fast-food teenager who hasn't quite grown into her voice. But upon reflection I realized her accent was not of a local suburban girl but of a woman from another country. Given that, her speech was more than clear enough, and my inability to understand her had the potential to make her feel out of place. Possibly even challenged, in some passive-aggressive way by this unseen yahoo, for being an immigrant. I felt bad about that, and made sure to remain cheerful and thankful when interacting with her at the window.

Continent of ancestry is completely irrelevant to me, and I cannot always tell anymore which continent a person has came from. This gal was probably South Asian, though she could have been Mexican. I've known one or two South Asians who've been mistaken for Mexicans around here. They find it amusing, especially if they've picked up a little Spanish. What's odd is that, even from her speech, I couldn't really tell. True, she didn't say much.

(That's my racist bastard story for today. Yes, I admit it, I am still bothered that there is a person on this planet who thinks I'm a racist. That he bases this on a gross misunderstanding of one thing I'm alleged to have written in a now-defunct blog, and that he also regularly demonstrates himself to be highly judgmental and deeply narcissistic and generally lacking in substance when picking fights, doesn't ameliorate the sting. Yes, some of you know who I mean. I have always been sensitive, and have only lately learned to identify self-loathing manipulators, and it will take time for those with particularly sharp blades to cease affecting me.)