Then I got more active Facebook-wise with Burning Man and switched my online activities related to that over to one of my alternate accounts. I did this because I didn't know what direction I was going to go in and wanted a) a way to connect with potentially odd new people without revealing personal details such as my real name and b) to avoid putting too much of my increasingly active social life in front of my sons while they were so close to their still-sometimes-angry mom.
Over the course of a couple years those concerns pretty much faded away. But now I am best known to a lot of people by my alternate Facebook persona, a lot of people whom I consider friends and who happen to have (or want) no inkling of my real name. Likewise, a whole bunch of those people, some of whom I am very close to, have been using bogus names such that I honestly have (or want) no clue as to their real names. The bogus names -- which are sometimes also playa names -- are more fun anyway.
So I had two Facebooks going at about the same level of activity. I liked that the experience with each was different than the other. It was like having two different houses to go to, two entirely different sets of friends. I had a small amount of overlap (people friends with both of me); but I pretty much eliminated that when it came out that someone else with two accounts could inadvertently have an unwelcome connection revealed because of my overlap. Some people truly need some aspects of their lives kept away from their legal identity, and it's a huge stressful pain in the ass to have to keep that social life off of Facebook. (Imagine, as a random just-made-up example, a justice of the peace whose cross-dressing weekends are enabled by social media. Are we really so uncompassionate as to snicker about that rather than help him?)
Facebook has started cracking down on fake names. Last autumn the news was full of the trauma induced when Facebook suddenly insisted a collection of professional drag queens use their legal names. Since these people were known personally and professionally by their drag names, the policy seemed ridiculous. It was especially ridiculous as people pointed out how many people who get value from the service need to have alternate personae as a safety measure. How hard is it really to find and snuff your ex wife if she's been marked as attending a shared acquaintance's wedding? Even if that never happens, it's no kindness to prevent her using an alt to feel safe. People need to feel safe.
Thus, when I decided I wanted to gain from the insight and camaraderie of people online to whom I could ask dumb personal questions about polyamory and open relationships and sex, I wanted to feel safe and do so anonymously. Even though those groups are closed and their traffic is not revealed outside, anyone you are friends with who happens to join will know you are there and see your stuff. A bunch of my Burnery people are in those groups and I was damned if I was going to reveal any concerns that might have anything to do with my partner where people who know her could see it. None of their damn business. So I started using my third account recently in order to join that community.
That lasted about a week. Today I logged in and got this.
When I hit continue I got this.
As an experiment I did what anyone would do: re-entered my fake name. What if it's real? How do they know it's not? I wanted to know what would happen next. Well, they didn't like it.
Not sure how their program knew to reject it. The name is a common two-word phrase with the first word also used as a name now and then. Think of names that are adjectives. There are a lot of them. And names that are nouns. Lots of those too. But somehow the clever combo I was using caught the machine's attention.
I could switch it to something a little less obvious, though it is already a lot less obvious than many that remain active, but it looks like that would require coming up with proof and who wants to go to the trouble of faking that? Well, I might, actually, to see what happens, just not tonight. Meanwhile I'll have to take my questions somewhere else ... except I don't want to bother with somewhere else. Do I really have to shop around for a community to safely discuss things in, where there is critical mass enough to deliver a broad array of opinions? I absolutely do not have the time or energy for that. So, no questions, no insight, no good.
So while I'm just whining, there are people with a legitimate beef with the policy: Native Americans whose names look to those socially stunted idiots in San Francisco (I figure everyone at Facebook is a mini Zuckerberg) like they're just clever fakes are getting locked out in droves. This is a lot more upsetting. We haven't seen the end of it.
5 comments:
Cunning Minx came up with proof that her name was real, and so she was able to resurrect her profile on Facebook.
Sorry that your third profile is targeted. I love that name! It's a bit of a big negative, but charmingly so.
How is it that one got hit, but not the pants one?
Noodling in the shower (as one does) and I recalled the days on Uselessnet when there were those who were all asshole about "real names."
Some believed I would behave better if I used my real name. They might look at my behavior on FB now and think there's proof positive, except I was so deep-seated angry with my life back then that I don't think there would have been a really significant difference. I mean, Sal was fairly mean in her way, and was proud of using her real name. Mingo was vicious, and Harwood could also be vicious. They didn't use cuss words the way I did, but still. And the fact that my persona was inextricably tied to my RN didn't slow me down much. I was a bitter, angry (but clever) troll, no matter what I called myself.
These days I am a happier being and it shows in all of my FB profiles. Although I don't use my third one much. It was created as a backup. I should log in and see if FB thinks it's fake.
Anyway, people are still quite certain there is a direct link between pseudonyms and bad behavior. While those who engage in bad behavior might be inclined to use pseudos, the pseudos they choose don't have to be obviously fake names. So it's ridic to insist that's the reason for the RN policy. It's clear that they want only to be able to track a person to his or her wallet and shopping habits.
Fuckwits.
The pants one looks real at first glance, I think. Or maybe Sly Glance was reported by someone being mean. Sly Glance has no real friends.
While Sly Glance is per FB a fake name, Nefarious Grin apparently is not. I don't know who that is but Mr Pants has six mutual friends with him. It was Nefarious Grin -- and a whole slew of others that are entertainingly false and active -- that inspired me to make that fake account.
I'm not feeling very patient with people who criticize others for using something other than their legal name on online fora. It's on them, not me, that they lack imagination, or refuse to be supportive when others need an insulating layer, and thus become judgmental.
Oh! I thought it was the other other one! My friend Liz messaged the other other one. I'm glad they're still letting that one hang around.
But Sly Glance is a very cool 'nym.
I also like Carbonated Roadsoda.
The other other one looks more real. Maybe I'll just use it for my nefarious purposes.
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